Last Goodbye

Hey you,
I never got a chance to explain. Please give me a second to speak up. Weeks, months went by in a struggling relationship. A roommate that hates me and a boyfriend that didn't trust me. Stress levels sky rocketed with no one to turn to. I felt alone for the first time in my life with no where to turn in a unfamiliar city. My manic episodes increased as my sanity decreased by day, hour, minute. I am no longer fit for a relationship, I'm scared and finding myself lashing out again. I find myself clinging to the only people that are there for me, even if that's an unpopular decision. Would you stay in a relationship that added to your stress and desires to abuse an addiction? yeah well that was my deciding question, the longer I waited to tell you, the worse I felt. But your life was busy and stressful, I didn't want to add to it. I love you, or I thought at one point I did. Maybe it was the comfortable feeling I fell in love with. I am sorry but this relationship wasn't going anywhere. You can hate him or blame us but it's not him. Yes I admit there's feelings there, feelings I've tried to squash but really i just want to be 21. i want to drink, fall in lust, make mistakes and have the time of my life. You need someone more stable and mature. I'm sorry this didn't work out the way we planned but thanks for the memories!
Sincerly,
The Girl Who Never Meant To Hurt You